Vito: What's wrong Garfee? You look like you've seen God or something...
Garfield: (*with awe in his face*)..I have been to the...OUTSIDE...
Zed: (*rolls his eyes and starts cleaning himself*)
Vito: How'd you manage that? You're supposed to be indoors only?
Garfield: It was very dangerous, but I persisted.
Vito: (*eyes wide*) Did you get hurt?
Garfield: (*in a hushed tone*) It was...so...much...clearer! The sky was so bright and blue! The wind on my whiskers tickled, and I could smell so much more different scents! Scents that I have no idea what they are that I want to go and track it!
Zed: That's poo you were smelling...
Vito: But how did you manage to get out?
Garfield: I had been planning this for a while now. And everything was just perfect that I had to proceed with my plan, AND I SUCCEEDED!!! HA-HA! (*jumps up on the table and puffs his tail triumphantly*)
Vito: Wow!!!
Zed: You are such a dork Garfield! I saw the woman pick you up and CARRY you outside! You should have seen yourself...I thought you were gonna piss right there and then...You were terrified dude! Your claws were digging into her shirt.
Vito: (*Scowls at Garfield*)
Zed: Yeah, he was latched and frozen onto her.
Garfield: Whatever... I still experienced the outside. (*lays down smugly*)
Zed: Talk about experiencing it, I was by myself, alone, starving, searching for shelter, fighting for my life in the Outside.
Garfield: Looked like you would have been good for a whole year without food with that belly of yours... lots of fat stored in there... great survival tip.
(*How a cat was able to flip the bird, I don't know, but Zed did it to Garfield. Must be his extra thumb*)
Zed: The night they rescued me, I was so hungry and tracking this field mouse. It was disgusting, but I knew I had to eat. I had been perched on a tree, watching it come and go from its hole.
Garfield: Hmph, must not have been a real tree, probably a stump or bush. You couldn't have carried your big butt up that high.
Vito: Shut up Garfield, this is an interesting story!!!
Zed: I quietly climbed down, and waited behind a bush, waiting for it to come back so I can make my kill.
Vito: ooohhhh....
Zed: And there it was, scurrying back, and I POUNCED! With extra thumbs, he had no chance of escape. And just as I was ready to take my bite, even though bile was rising up my throat, the night went really bright! I froze and then felt a noose around my neck. I fought and scratched and hissed back, but they were able to restrain me and they took me. Later I found out the bright lights were big flashlights; I thought I was being abducted by aliens.
Vito: Wow!!!
Garfield: eh...(*pretending not to be impressed*)
Zed: Now that's not just experiencing, but living in the Outside. Dude, you poop in a box; the whole world was my bathroom, hehehe.
Vito: The whole yard is my bathroom! I get to run and play outside everyday. And Garfee is all locked up in here, awww...
Garfield: Whatever...
Zed: Kid, I tell you, the freedom was wonderful, but I'd take comfort over that anytime. (*goes to Vito’s bed, lays back and stretches*)
Vito: That's my bed! Get out! (*nudges zed off the bed*)
Garfield: (*gets up on the cat perch and stares out the window, wistfully*) Whatever... I still experienced the outside...
***http://furside.blogspot.com/***
Posts
