Christmas Stockings

*Tall Dude is removing the paneling under the stoop to get to the Christmas decorations.*

Garfield: What the hell??!! They’re tearing up the house! Huh? A secret closet?

Vito: Yay! They’re bringing out the Christmas decorations again!

Zed: *yawn* woo…hoo…

Tall Dude: Get out of there Garfield!!!

Garfield: But I wanna see what’s in here!

Mommy: Hand that tote over to me, I think that’s where the stockings are.

Vito: Huh? Why does Zed’s stocking look like a mitten?

Zed: Because I am not a conformist.

Garfield: Because you’re a freak and have an extra thumb! Hahaha! Awesome!

*Mommy starts hanging the stockings on the ledge.*

Garfield: *sniffs the stockings* errr…so what are these for?

Vito: On Christmas eve, Santa Claus comes down the chimney and stuffs the stockings with toys and gifts!

Zed: Santa Claus is not real…and we do not have a chimney…

Garfield: Really?? Toys and gifts?

Zed: No, YOU get coals in your stockings coz you have just been a pain in the butt all year round.

Vito: I want Bling! For Christmas…or maybe some booties, it can get really cold outside.

Zed: I want those automatic treat dispensers.

Garfield: I can just see that dispenser going non-stop and Zed laying right beside it scarfing every single treat. HAHAHA!

Vito: What do you want for Christmas, Garfield?

*Garfield jumps up the ledge and knocks off all the stockings except his*

Everyone: GARFIELD!!!!

Garfield: I figured, if Santa comes and sees only one stocking, he’ll stuff everything in there, all for me mwahahaha!

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!